I sit and stare
as raindrops run down the windows
the cars outside
go by as faded memories
I once wrote that things,
life and people,
are funny to me...
it's odd sometimes
wandering around
getting lost in your own thoughts
trying to figure out life
purpose of existence
and what it amounts to
does it amount to anything worth while?
____
it's dark outside
I can barely see the cars driving by
- only making them out by their headlights
thunder rumbles off in the distance
as flashes of lightning flicker
and brighten the sky for a matter of seconds
the raindrops fall hard
and break the calmness of the sitting puddles
just as the customers in the store
breaks the calmness of me
the customers leave
and the distant thunder rumbles on
along with some smooth sounds
of Acid Jazz/Hip-Hop
bringing me back
to a settled calm state
taking the lyrics in
and sitting beside my thoughts
the calmness gets broken up a bit
by a couple of raindrops (customers)
but easily returns shortly
so I just sit
with my thoughts
staring out at the puddles
beaten by raindrops
as the cars pass.
____
nag champa is the scent
and the doors is the sound
the setting is the sanctuary of my bedroom
and as per usual
it's a routine situation.
____
I have so much in my head right now
thoughts have been running wild
but my laziness took control a while ago.
____
yet another day
pretty much completely wasted away
by me laying in my bed
locked in this dungeon of my room.
____
boredom
fear
fear of boredom
fucking no motivation for anything
just going through the motions
boredom,
that rat bastard.
