Failing...at Life, and Slowly Dying

my ears ring deafening

my heart pounds hard and heavy

in my chest

my stomach is twisted in knots

I am so exhausted

I just want to sleep

sleep away life

yet the caffeine from the coffee

has me wired

wide awake

shakey and jittery

hunger does hit

my stomach grumbles

knowing I should eat

yet I can not

can not bring myself to do so

the thought of food

the thought of eating

my stomach twists and knots more

I get nauseous

I go numb

the shakes and jitters return

overtaking my body

it's a fear

the fear grasps me

failing...at life

falling apart 

-

love and hate, hate and love

beginning to hate the love, and

love the hate

how will this life

of a broken man end?

how will death be?