[untitled]

 april 2024

the spring started with a blizzard

heavy snowfall

...

some weeks have blurred by

maybe a month, or so

I can't remember anymore

I've been locked away again

stuck inside the prisoncell

of my head

thoughts

anxiety and depression

words to other poems

fill my mind

I've missed far too many opportunities

to write

laying late nights in bed

with headphones on

Daniel Johnston or Waylon Jennings

missing late nights - the middle of the night

alone

writing

yet I don't care

about the weed,

wine or whiskey anymore

-

oh to be creative again.

to create.

once again I'm finding it to be

a severe struggle to be happy.

feeling like

I don't want this life anymore.